Oh muh gosh! You guys! Why am I struggling so hard to get back into routine?!?! Like seriously, you’d think that I’d be able to find a way to just sit and chill and excuse getting cozy and doing a lot of computer work/ blogging but I haven’t been able to catch my breath! Every day last week, I was on my feet for 12-15 hours straight without any breaks or stopping or sitting down. Great for my step count- horrible for my body, psyche, and stress level. I just felt like I was behind on EVERYTHING and that I couldn’t catch up. And then, like an idiot, I got into a couple projects I didn’t realize were so time consuming until I was committed. One of those projects was insulating our garage. It started with the thought that we were hosting Easter in our garage with a few neighbors and I was already just doing a quick sweep, vacuuming, cobweb control, etc. and I notices the windows on the garage door could using a quick wipe down. So I pulled them all down, and realized I could go ahead and throw up the insulation our friend gave us. In the process I also noticed it wouldn’t install properly unless I scrubbed the door, dried it, and that I couldn’t re-install the windows without a caulk sealant, since that wasn’t done when they were originally installed, in addition to needing a special tape to install it. This all meant time, errands, money, and in summation… no rest for the weary. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it to myself. But hey the garage is done and I accomplished a project by myself and that felt pretty good. I’m feeling more on top of stuff this week but I broke my toe and my ankle is still slightly sprained and taking forever to heal so I’m taking things slower the last couple days.
Another project on my agenda was to get all of the craft stuff re-organized. We had some stuff in the hall closet, some in a few random bins, and some very poorly organized in Emmy’s little craft cabinet. So I condensed all my sewing stuff to the hall closet and was able to get all the craft supplies in our front room that we’ll eventually utilize as our home school room.
Unfortunately, other than staying on track with my healthy eating, I haven’t had the opportunity to focus on or try any new recipes specifically. I have been keeping up with my physical goals though. Not just keeping up with them but surprisingly surpassing them and even adding in new accomplishments I didn’t think possible. One of which was biking off road. Isaac and Emmy absolutely love riding bikes. Honestly, I’ve never really enjoyed them or seen the appeal past about 16 years old. But since they insisted I got a bike, we finally decided to go try a local biking trail which is quite extensive. So a couple weeks ago, we went on a 6 mile ride, and this past weekend we did 9 miles. Especially factoring in that my bike is a simple cruiser bike and not even slightly equipped for intermediate, off road trails, and that I haven’t ridden a bike in about 10 years, I was pretty happy with the accomplishment (but insanely proud of my 4 year old who only just learned to ride without training wheels about 6 weeks ago! And yes- she biked the whole thing). I still don’t particularly enjoy riding bikes even though I’ve obviously proven my capability. I only do it because Isaac and Emmy enjoy it so much and with this quarantine thing in affect it’s about the only thing we can do outside together that makes sense. Plus I mean it isn’t like it doesn’t help me try new things and stay active. Maybe it will be an acquired taste. What do you think? Are you a bike riding enthusiast of any degree?
Here’s a little gallery of our biking shenanigans thus far…
In other news, we had a great Easter. We got up and had breakfast, watched the video of the Easter story that I put in my previous post, then Emmy opened her basket. Then we wrapped up some cooking, got dressed, watched our online Easter service, and then met up with our neighbors in our garage for a fun time of hanging out, eating, and letting the kids egg hunt and play. All in all, lotsa fun and a nice day despite the fact I was struggling super hard emotionally for some reason. (Side note- I can’t wait for my hormones to get regulated and my body to finally kick into gear… anytime now, yo!)
I am very much enjoying having an active lifestyle. Getting it jump started was definitely no small feat. I’ve had days that I don’t want to work out or focus on steps (for no valid reason). I’ve worked out and powered intense soreness, through knee injuries, ankle injuries, and now a broken toe like I mentioned earlier. I have also needed to make amendments to my schedule and routine and have had days that it took all I had in me to prioritize either a walk or a workout… or both. But I’m so grateful for the determination and willpower that has helped me plug through the hard and painful parts to be where I am now… and I still have so much farther to go but I’m excited and ready! One of the things I’ve been thoroughly enjoying has been the workout group I’m part of on Facebook that I went into a little detail about in a previous post.
One of the daily challenges they posted was a “Chopped” challenge with the ingredients of chicken, beans, a condiment, and cheese. So I made a southwest style chicken salad with black beans, mayo, salsa, salt and pepper, shredded fiesta blend cheese, and of course chicken. It was super delicious and my favorite challenge for sure!
I’ve also been enjoying having a protein shake for breakfast. I’m not a smoothie person but the Shakology base is so good and satisfying and easy to add things to without altering the flavor or texture too much.
Something that has been discouraging is that I haven’t been losing any weight despite the fact that I’ve been considered “highly active” for about 6 weeks and that I’ve been eating proper portions and drinking water. I’m hoping that maybe it’s just taking my body a while to kick into gear and that when it does, I’ll start losing weight consistently. One factor I know is my thyroid. I had to go off of my thyroid medicine but I’m thinking about adding it back in but in a smaller dose. I’ve been losing hair again, my nails are shredding and falling apart, and I’m having horrible afternoon crashes and mood swings. I’ve been on supplements to combat all those issues but it’s undeniably my thyroid symptoms flaring back up.
On the note of drinking water- I have accomplished something I didn’t think I could… at least not without a lot of effort and acclimation. I am now effortlessly drinking a whole gallon of water each day! And being perfectly honest, it’s this water bottle that’s made all the difference. It’s 40 ounces, has 2 parts to the lid, and a great handle for toting around. I only have to drink 3 of these a day to get in a full gallon. I typically try to get a full one in between 6-10AM, another between 10AM and 2/3PM, and my last one from 2/3PM til bedtime. My particular water bottle is from Walmart for $14.99. Amazon has several that are similar so if you’re avoiding going inside Walmart, that’s a great option so you can join the water drinking bandwagon.
This is pretty much all I’ve got right now. I’m going to adjust my blogging schedule a bit and keep the content more about my journey and day to day life right now. If I get a random whim to write about miscarriage, marriage, or other thought paths, I’ll post those randomly. Right now I’m so consumed with and focused on all I’m doing to change into an active and healthy lifestyle that trying to calm my mind to write on other emotional stuff is just too much. It overwhelms me because I already don’t handle emotions well… or at all really. I haven’t had a moment of personal space or any time to myself where I could just process or feel freely since losing Leo so it just stresses me out and mentally overwhelms me with all the other stuff I want to give my energy to. I’ve been trying to just stay positive and move on and not let Emmy, the house, or life in general be adversely affected so I ignored the majority of my emotions as much as possible from the beginning. As we dig into the reproductive endocrinologist appointments and everything I’m sure I’ll start processing more since it will be staring me in the face. Until then I’m just ignoring all those thought paths. Forcing myself to write about anything is not going to work for me right now.
I hope everyone is staying sane, healthy, and enjoying to more laid back version of life with the season we’re in right now. Happy Friday Eve!
Big Loss - Big Resolution 
😁😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
🥰❤️😘
LikeLike